The Bro Zone: The Female Version of the Friend Zone
The Friend Zone: One place that every guy dreads having to go, and who could blame them? Meet a pretty girl, go out a few times, stay up late texting, flirting, you think you really might have a thing with this girl!…and then she starts telling you all her problems about this other guy…am I right? That’s right about when you know you’ve been shipped off to Friend Zone Island, and it sucks! Because let’s be real, what really can you do? Once you’re friend zoned, you’re friend zoned for life. I have a lot of guys friends, and they all complain to me constantly about the friend zone. It makes me kinda sad but I’ll admit, I have a few guys in my friend zone and sometimes it makes me sad I had to put them there because they really are great guys.
But before you go and start saying all girls suck, they only pick assholes, lead you on and then break your heart; I want you to know this, there ARE a select few of us girls who understand, and there’s a reason we understand.
We’re known as the “bros”, and let me tell you, I am the Queen of Bro Zone Land. Us bros feel the same pain that a guy in the friend zone does; we meet a nice guy, go and hit at the batting cages a few times, get a late beer, stay up late texting, maybe even hook up one or two times…until the one dreaded day we realize that’s as far as it’s ever gonna go. When a guy starts talking about you being their wing man at a party, or you know, when they just straight up tell you, “You’re a bro”, you kind of get the hint.
The bro/friend zone is such a weird grey area, you never know when or why you’re gonna end up there, and at least from my experience, you don’t usually see it coming. Although we all hate being put there, the friend zone exists for a reason. Yes, okay so the bro/friend zone means they don’t want to date you, but it doesn’t mean they don’t like you. It probably actually means they really do like you: something I find is often very rare at this age (how many of your “friends” do you really truly 100% like? Be honest) If I’ve been put it in the bro zone, I usually take it as a compliment; it means the guy doesn’t think I’m a psycho chick, but laid back like his “bros”, I’m easy to hang around with, and we have similar interests. Awesome! 90% of my girlfriends couldn’t give two sh*t’s about sports. The bro zone also means that though he may not be interested in dating me, he is interested in keeping me around as a good friend, for advice, a beer pong partner, and usually for a bit of arm candy (which yes, you definitely should take advantage of to dress up nice ladies).
A bit of advice though, if you don’t think you can handle the bro zone, don’t attempt it. If you really like this guy, and you can’t JUST be his friend, don’t. Don’t mess things up for yourself, don’t make a fool of yourself just because you want to be around this guy (same goes for you friend zoned dudes). The bro zone does not mean FWB’s, it means what it says; you’re a bro, and a bro doesn’t hook up with his other bros. Don’t even try to hook up with him, and if the guy tries to get with you, walk away. It just means he’s a douche, he’s using you, and you’re totally on his hook.
The bro/friend zone is a tricky thing and I’m not saying I have all the answers, or any I guess…because if I did I wouldn’t be sitting here in the bro zone. What I do think though is that we give that zone a bad rap for no reason. Sure, it may totally suck at first because you thought this relationship was really going somewhere, but take it as a compliment because that person clearly wants you around as a friend that they aren’t going to lose after a failed relationship.
I don’t know about you all, but I’m 21 and at a weird place in life where I don’t have as many friends as I used to. I have my whole life to find my baseball playing hunk, but now is the time I make the friends that I invite to be at our wedding. I think we just spend too much of our life worried about who our next significant other is going to be, and not enough time building relationships. So next time you get put into the bro/friend zone, don’t think about how they didn’t see that you’re “wife (or husband) material”, be thankful that you now have another awesome friend to watch you walk down the aisle and become a wife/husband someday.